If you deal with chronic pain, mobility issues, and health issues, you know how simple tasks are no longer so simple. I fought with myself for a long time feeling inadequate and pathetic because I wanted a dishwasher.
Once I had said dishwasher my home and life became easier to manage and maintain. Doing dishes by hand put added strain on my neck causing migraines. I put off doing dishes and struggled to maintain my self respect because of the disaster feeling any time visitors dropped by. It was a big blow to my ego to not be able to maintain a clean home.
Now that I have the dishwasher, I won’t say I am perfect. I still struggle but that is one area that causes me less pain and is much easier to maintain.
Once I realized how much help the dishwasher was, I wanted a robot vacuum. Vacuuming definitely caused pain and strain so I definitely didn’t maintain my carpets the way I used to before my injury. I still had trouble justifying the cost until my old vacuum had run its course.
Considering the price differences between robot vacuums and cheaper versions made me feel frivolous for wanting more. Fortunately for me, I mentioned my want for this item, the benefits, and how I would be beyond happy for any contributions towards it. My loved ones came through and contributed to me getting the gift that keeps my floors 90% cleaner than they would be without it.
My appliances help tremendously every day. I appreciate having on site laundry, a dishwasher, and a robot vacuum. I am able to run these appliances and do other cleaning, rest or self care. I no longer feel guilty or frivolous for having these items. It isn’t my choice to have chronic pain and health issues. These items make life a little easier to manage each day. I won’t take the gift of having these appliances for granted. I appreciate having a cleaner home because I have these tools to help me.
If you can afford these items but are feeling like you don’t deserve them then it is time to stop feeling guilty. If you struggle and can find a tool or appliance to help you live a better life then it is time to go ahead and put these tools and appliances to good use. It doesn’t mean you are any less of a person for needing a little extra help in one aspect of life. It is smart and shows strength to admit you need help. We all need help in some aspect of life so the sooner we admit it and work on it the better.
I had to give up on certain ideals and wishes. A clean house is worth the extra money I paid to have an easier time managing all of the struggles of my life. Maybe some can afford a house cleaning service. Some days I would love to hire one. Other days I realize my wish may or may not work well in my situation.
Most of us just need to ask our loved ones for some help and understanding. Trying to be the superhero and do it all makes life more difficult than it needs to be. Once I swallowed my pride and admitted I will never be perfect, never even be as good as I used to be because of my injury, life became simpler.
I felt less guilty. I felt more deserving of help. I felt like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders and I had hope that I might be able to manage my life and home a little better. And I felt less alone in my struggles. Feeling like I could talk about my struggles and have loved ones understand and be supportive is so important. Don’t feel you have to struggle alone.
I still have difficult days and I still struggle. Having the tools and people to help me through makes me realize how blessed I am. I wish I didn’t have the pain and have to struggle of course…but it is always easier when I share the burden with others who care and want to help.
Tracey, GYST2020
GYST2020 
Leave a Reply